Monday, June 29, 2009
Marriage Monday: R-E-S-P-E-C-T
Proverbs 11:16 A kindhearted woman gains respect, but ruthless men gain only wealth.
Ephesians 5:33 However, each one of you must love your wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Titus 2:2 Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound of faith, in love and in endurance.
1 Peter 3:7 Husband, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.
To end June, I gave you a wedding song as the video of the day. I will always remember my wedding day almost seven years ago and that my wife and I danced to this song as we began our lives together.
We have talked much about love and encouragement with Marriage Monday, but today I also want to talk about respect. As we have seen in June, two governors have had to be disgraced and go on television to tell us that they had affairs on their wives. There is nothing respectful in having a press conference to tell people you messed up with the one person you’ve committed to be with for the rest of your life before God.
I’ve heard people that have been through infidelity tell me and others that I just had to love my spouse through this. While this is true, there is much more to it than that.
Solomon talks about how kindhearted women gain respect, but ruthless men gain only money or wealth. This verse talks about who your God really is. If wealth becomes your master, you tend to forget people. I’m not saying that husbands should not provide, however, if that provision becomes the goal, then everyone misses out and that is the point here. Loving hearts with kindness shows more of a value on people than on anything else.
That’s why Paul tells husbands to love their wives as much as themselves. Ladies, I think some of you know that there are men out there that really, really love themselves. Guys, we have to balance that perspective of self-love with a healthy dose of love for those around us. I’m not saying to not love yourself, but keep it in check.
Titus 2:2 is a powerful verse. I’ve always recommended (to myself) and others that you find an older couple to be accountable with. Growing in self control, faith and good temperament is not something usually in our youth. We’re often impulsive, reactionary and quick to judge and condemn in our younger years. Learning these qualities from couples that have been there help us achieve the dream of a long marriage.
Finally, Peter tells us to be considerate and realize that couples are joint heirs to a great married life. The last part is something I love to consider. I want to be a good husband so that nothing hinders my prayers. Don’t you want what’s best for you? For your families and your future? Sure you do. Some of us have some vocal and strong wives (based on what they’ve been through and some were just raised that way) and may not seem like the weaker partner. However, they still are. They have a sensitive side that wants the best and they need a leader (that hero in you husbands) to take them there.
I love you guys!